Weekly Update: Grizzly Bears & Dirty Girls

I got the idea for a weekly update-type post from Ashley, who does a Weekend Wrap-Up post every week. I enjoy reading her updates, so I thought I’d try it out and see what you think. 🙂

Here’s what’s been going in my inner and outer worlds this week:

Bloggy stuff

  • Three posts went up this week: 1) Peaceful Jaws of Avoidable Death (Countering Cognitive Distortions), 2) 15 Things I Want You to Know About Anxiety Recovery, and 3) 3 Steps to Work Through Anxious Thoughts + My Real-Life Example
  • It looks like I’ve been tagged by Mental Health from the Other Side for the Sunshine Blogger Award thread. Thank you so much! I’ll work on my post this week! And congrats on your own nomination 🙂 🙂 I love your blog.
  • My bloggy friends at Our DiD Journey were kind enough to reblog my latest post on working through anxious thoughts, and they said some very nice and flattering things about it, which gave me the warm and fuzzies.
  • In an unexpected twist to the previous point, the reblog promptly wreaked havoc on their site by plastering the caption Lizard (gecko?) saying “calm your tits” across every page. Which is not ideal. But they fixed their code and all is well in the world now.
  • And for even more twisting, the whole situation was also a little (funny? ironic?), because the caption in question came from a GIF I used in my own post, and it was the one part of my post that I was hesitant to use in case it offended anyone. I’ve since updated the caption in that post to reflect some anxiety I was having about it — because I want to show real-life anxiety in action, too. (See screenshot below)
  • Adding that update to the post may be what you’d call a “safety behaviour” — something you do to ease your own anxiety. But I let myself get away with it, because the bigger safety behaviour would have been deleting or replacing the GIF altogether. And this felt like an opportunity to talk about safety behaviours and also give myself a bit of exposure to discomfort.

Family stuff

  • Last night, inexplicably, my son (almost 5) took to calling me a “dirty girl,” and all I could think was, “HOW DOES HE KNOW?”
  • Meanwhile, my daughter (3) mistakenly believes that the word for “breasts” is actually “nipples,” and this has resulted in her frequently saying to me, “You have really big nipples, Mommy!” which unintentionally taps into one of my body conscious areas and triggers brief flashes of “Oh my god, I do have gigantic nipples. What am I going to do with my life?” before I get those thoughts under control.
  • Back to my son. He developed a habit of asking us, “Don’t you even KNOW yourself?” which is way deeper than he means for it to be, and all I can think is, “No. No, son. I don’t. I really don’t. Does anyone?”
  • I had a moment of quiet confidence yesterday when I stood up for my son at the post office! This is a big milestone for me, because my intense fear of conflict has made it hard for me to be the grizzly bear mom I’ve always felt I should be. It’s actually been a big source of shame and loathing toward myself as a mom. But yesterday, I spoke up for him. I wasn’t a grizzly bear, maybe more of a black bear, but still. The bear was there.

Week(s) ahead

I have so many ideas for upcoming post topics/series:

  • A friend of mine suggested writing about how to approach a friend who is struggling with anxiety but doesn’t know it, or doesn’t realize the extent of it.
  • And, related to that, how I eventually knew it was time to get help.
  • I also want to write about how anxiety impacts or has impacted my freelancing, parenting, pregnancy, fitness, marriage, and more.
  • And, maybe, someday when I’m feeling bolder and a little more sure of my audience, anxiety in the bedroom. Anxiety reaches its tendrils into all areas of a person’s life, after all. If it’s valuable to you, I’ll go there.

Have a wonderful weekend, you beautiful, bad-ass blushers!

16 thoughts on “Weekly Update: Grizzly Bears & Dirty Girls

  1. If you have really big nipples perhaps that’s why you need to calm your tits?

    Well done at the post office! And to get all fancy about it, staying quiet and playing dead is passive communication, grizzly bear is aggressive communication, and black bear is assertive communication. Go black bear!

    Liked by 2 people

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